We had the hardest meeting with our Social Worker this week. We knew it was coming, but the reality of it was so difficult.
We sat for our 8th meeting with our social worker and literally had to go through an A4 checklist of what we could and couldn’t accept in an adopted child. It seemed so cold and callous, I mean when I had my daughter I didn’t have the option (nor would I have wanted it). In fact, when pregnant with my daughter I refused certain tests as I knew that no matter what they told me, I would not be able to terminate my pregnancy.
I stared at the form for a long time and then spoke with Peter. I said that the only way I could comfortably do this would be to consider the impact upon placing a child with certain needs or issues with our daughter.
As soon as I had her in my mind, it became easier and when we finished going through the form there was a very clear message from us. We realised we could agree to pretty much cope with any physical impairment, but we would not risk many psychological impairments.
This form haunted me for weeks, and I had no idea how relevant it would become to me in the future … and how irrelevant it would become to social services.